Thursday, February 12, 2015

Hurling Hurricanes!

I'm going to start naming our bouts of illness after tropical storms.

I think it would make pretty good cover for the evening news.  Maybe Brian Williams would like to pick this up . . .

"Gastrointestinal Distress Ivan is slowly churning it's way through the family, leaving devastation in it's wake.  Damage to couches, carpet and clothing is extensive."

"Stay tuned for our exclusive report as Random Fever And Aches Maybelle sends temperatures rising and tempers flaring across Eastern Oklahoma this month.  One local mother has given up entirely on ever leaving her home."

"Tonight's broadcast is sponsored by Zofran, Children's Tylenol and Lindor Chocolate"

Elle has been struck by Kidney Infection Katrina this week while Alvin and Ana are snowed under by Feverish Depression Hugo. 

We are currently under a Red Flag Influenza Watch.

Robert returned from his adventures in Vietnam exactly  3 weeks ago today.  (Guest post by Handsome Hunk to follow!) In my joy to see him, I ran and gave him a big, slobbery kiss.  We spent the day catching up.  I fixed his favorite meal.  We opened the gifts and viewed the pictures and heard his stories. 

We went to bed.

I didn't get out of bed for nearly two days.

I had finally succumbed to Norovirus Nadine.

I'm so glad Robert was home!  I hung on there to the bitter end.  It was a relief to finally get sick and get it over with.

Except it wasn't over.

Robert got sick a few days later.  I sure hope the kiss was worth it.  I feel really bad about that.

And, it still isn't over.  It keeps recirculating, much like the jet stream.  Just when I think we are well enough to venture forth to church or the grocery store, someone comes down sick within the hour.

So here we are, bumping along, taking our hits and thankful every time that it's not The Big One.  I am hoping and praying that Alvin and Ana aren't hit by The Perfect Storm that has been so devastating to our state this year.  My heart goes out to all those who have lost loved ones.  I know that we are all just heartbeats away from life being forever changed.  I am so thankful that I have an Unchanging God, my Rock and Anchor come what may.  Tonight I am weary, tired of missing church, tired of the roller coaster of illness.  I know that God has this under control.  I can trust him to get us through.  One snuggle, one story, one cached Lindor Truffle at a time, we are going to make it.

And then I'm throwing a party!

And someone will probably throw up in the middle of it . . .


Tuesday, February 3, 2015

7 Days, 5 Kids, 1 Mom - Weekend!

He's on his way home!!!

He won't get here until tomorrow morning, after twenty four hours of travel, but it is such a relief to know he is on his way.  I have missed him so much.  I feel like Bonny without her Clyde.  Lucy without Ricky.  Wilma sans Fred.

 Robert'n'Mary just belong together.

In other news, I survived the weekend.  It remains to be seen if I will make it through the week unscathed by The Crud.  This may be my last entry in the Captain's Log.

Saturday we celebrated my niece's third birthday at Chuck E Cheese.  I didn't know if the kids would be well enough to go, but after a whole week of no vomit it seemed that we were past the danger.

"It seemed", being the operative phrase here . . .

When we got to the party, naturally the kids all scattered to play the arcade games, games that have been touched by little germy fingers and sneezed upon all day.  You would think that I would have slathered everyone in hand sanitizer before they dug in to the pizza.  That would be an incorrect assumption.  I didn't even think about that until most of the pizza was already devoured.  Too late!

We stayed in Oklahoma City with my mom that night.   I laid out our church clothes for the next day.  I climbed into bed next to Mi Madre.  It was just like a slumber party!

  The bathroom door slammed as we heard the unmistakeable sounds of a child getting violently sick.  It was Dee.  Poor little fella.

Well, that nixed church for the next day.  And I really didn't want to travel with sick and potentially sick kids in the car.  So, we stayed snug and cozy with mom all day.  The kids have been complaining all week that they felt nauseous.  It seemed most pronounced around mealtimes, which seemed most suspicious to me.  If something fun was afoot, they were magically healed.  But truth be told, I haven't been feeling well for nearly a month.  And, no, it's NOT what you're thinking!  So, we took Sunday easy.  We watched Netflix and played a few games and went across the street to the park. The next morning we ladies went shopping with my aunt while the boys played Risk with their uncle.  Everyone seemed fit as a fiddle.  The boys were pleading that I take them to the Museum of Osteology in Moore.  I felt like we should try to get home in time for karate.  They insisted they were too sick for karate.  I decided if they were too sick for karate, they were definitely too sick for the museum.  So, we went home.

After supper, Dee and Cy asked if they could work on a special project for breakfast in the morning.  Not wanting to squelch their creativity, I said yes.  I thought they were just going to be looking over recipes, so I foolishly agreed to stay in my room and not peek at what they were doing.  I took a shower.  When I got out, I overheard Dee admonishing Cy, "We better get this cleaned up, mom should never know about this."

Since they were being "so responsible" to clean up and I really didn't want to know, I stayed in my room and read.  After awhile, Cy popped in, something tightly clutched in his grimy paws.

"We made pancakes, mom!  It's our own special recipe!  Taste it!"

It tasted a lot like corn starch. 

"What's in this, honey?" 

"Oh, just flour, milk, vanilla, applesauce and corn starch."

Yep, it was cornstarchy all right and about three inches thick.

 "Did you guys make a mess?"

 "Well, yeah, but don't worry, we'll clean it up!"

 Famous last words . . .

This is what I awoke to

  Dee will have to clean it up by himself.  Cy succumbed to The Crud in the middle of the night.

 I really wish I hadn't eaten that hand delivered pancake, now.

Just one more day and my Sweet Baboo will be home!  I am trying valiantly to not get sick in the meantime.

 Hang on, this might get bumpy . . .