Sick and tired of being tired.
Too tired to take any of the chirrupy advice found in my various and sundry "depression" and "encouragement" posts.
I know my attitude stinks. I know I have behaved abominably to the people I love most. I know I am not walking very close to God right now.
I don't know what's for dinner. I don't know why Ana cries and projectile vomits like a Soviet warhead. I don't know who attacked the couch cushions with preschool safety scissors.
I am uncertain how, when or if I should proceed with potty training. It is unclear what I should do about finishing up school. I am undecided whether church camp is worth the effort this year.
But I am confident to my very core it is going to be okay.
He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young.
This verse is getting taped to my mirror.
I don't know what I need to perk myself up. A shower or bubble bath? Coffee or filtered water? Chocolate or apples? A day off or a day cleaning? Valium or Vitamin D? Exercise or a nap?
I do know that my Shepherd will lead me. He's got this. He cares about the weakest and most vulnerable. One day, one hour, one breath at a time, He can show me what to do next.
I just have to ask.